Did you miss me?

Did you know I was gone? In a grand effort to force the time between transfer and beta to go much much faster, I have stayed away from blogs. I went to my brother's for a short visit, cleaned out the closets in my house...you know just stuff to keep my mind from racing.

So here is a recap: We did a 5dt of 2 blasts. Everyone said it was a great report. After 10 out of 10 eggs fertilized, one arrested and one fragmented. So going into the the transfer there were 6 still growing for potential freeze. 2 actually made it freeze. So overall I feel like this was a good "batch". After looking up the grade of blasts that they transferred (one was a 4BB and the other was a 1BB), I decided that they are just middle of the road quality blasts. Wish there was an "A" in there somewhere, but I am 40 after all. We now have 4 total in the freezer. Although according to the nurse practitioner, we should do as many fresh cycles while I'm on the younger side vs an FET...but lets jump off that bridge when we get there.

My beta was yesterday. I had a good idea of what the result was going to be before I did the test. I've had some heartburn, my boobs are huge and sore......my beta was 29! My clinic does a very early beta at 7dp5dt so the number doesn't sound great compared to the initial betas I see on other blogs, but it is a BFP and I'll take it!! They are supposed to freeze this 1st specimen and not run it until the second one is drawn 2 days later so they can evaluate doubling time...but this lab always runs it the same day. Because my beta is so early, I don't usually have to fight the urge to POAS, but I do cheat a little and look up my results in the computer before my clinic calls. By the time the IVF nurse calls to congratulate me, I've already called C and told him the news. Last night I did contemplate POAS, just so I could see the lines...how crazy is that?

I am taking this one step at a time. I am happy, but not ecstatic. I am hopeful, but realistic. I am trying desperately not to look too far ahead, but yesterday I had a little daydream about my daughter (who will be 5 this summer) rubbing my belly and feeling the baby move.

My next challenge is to stay in the moment, and only look as far ahead as the next test. Fortunately at this stage of the game, the next step is usually only at the most a week away. My next beta is tomorrow.